Child Contact at Christmas

As the Christmas season approaches many families are looking forward to spending quality time together.  This is particularly so where there are young children in the family with parents wanting to make it a magical time for them.  Sadly, where parents are separated or divorced Christmas can be an emotive and difficult time.

Sometimes it is necessary to take a step back and try to separate emotions from the practicalities and most importantly to remember that the best interests of the child is paramount when negotiating Christmas arrangements.  With young children their excitement will have been building up for many weeks in the run up to the day itself.

It is usual for Christmas and other holidays to be negotiated when contact arrangements are finalised during divorce or separation processes but sometimes the process has not yet reached that stage, arrangements need to change or arguments still ensue.

It may seem like an ideal solution to share the day with the children spending part of the day with each parent but in reality this may not be so.    When the long awaited big day arrives, presents unwrapped and children happily engrossed playing with them, parents should ask themselves if it is then fair to uproot them and move them to the other parent’s home which may involve a long journey.  Looking at your plans from your child’s perspective may help you to understand the practicalities and lead to a happier and more relaxed time for you all.   Using Boxing Day as a ‘second’ Christmas day may be a better solution.   The focus must always be the child and their happiness.

Open conversation between parents about holiday plans is always a good starting point and starting this as early as possible will give time to come to a considered decision and avoid conflict. Look at the whole holiday period rather than concentrating on the one day. Flexibility is vital as plans can be adapted.  Agree budgets for present buying rather than using it as a competition to outdo each other.

If holiday plans include foreign travel remember that consent from all parties with parental responsibility is a legal necessity. This is absolutely essential to avoid allegations of child abduction.

Of course, it is not always possible to come to an agreement and in those circumstances legal advice may have to be sought.  It is important that this is dealt with as early as possible in the run up to Christmas to avoid last minute legal action.  In extreme cases a Child Arrangement Order may need to obtained.

Our expert family lawyers can advise you on all aspects of child arrangements